http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/localnews/2002244026_rickwhite17m.html
The thought of Bush involving himself in Washington state irritates my tender sensibilities, so I wrote the following e-mail to the Washington State Republican't Chairman--Vance. It is scarcastic, nasty, and totally without class, but I need the catharsis, so bear with me!
Mr. Vance:I read that you want our peerless leader to anoint you the candidate for Washington's contested Senate seat in 2006. (To heck with actual Washingtonians-huh? After all, we do not make decisions about candidates in own own state, right?) Here is my prayer, on behalf of your presumed candidacy, to that true Washington State insider, benefactor, visitor and beloved 44% approval rated, Bush.
"Oh Lord, "Bubble Boy"! We beseech you to grant our lowly wish! Intercede, oh leader of the accomplished mission banner, on the behalf of our "nuclear election threat" wielding and sullen Vance!
Grant him the keys to the Washington Senate primary that you hold in trust for God in the Crawford of the Texas-- Where else! Grant him the intemperance of bombast, the sleight of misdirection, the boom of hyperbole, the twinge of fear and facility of prevarication as tools for his holy quest in your name and likeness!
Grant him adoring, albeit sufficiently homogenized, crowds for his campaign! But, be not sullied or polluted, by the logical masses or the blue of this state!
Let no backsliding or thoughtful opponent, darken his vista! Let not science darken his foray! Make him not a soul to lie down in the gutter and peccancy of logic! Let him Frist always!
Let subservience to you, Old Bubble Boy, and to guns, Gitmo, the rich, Newt and Scalia style hunting morals guide his way!
Let not the scourge of the less fortunate or the shrill whine of ecologists foil his quest! In all things, Let your example of personal responsibility apply! But, grant him, Old Bubble Boy, the courage to avoid common sense, as you have shown in your teachings!
Grant him eternal visits from Cheney of the Valkyrie, to Cheney of the Spokane! Grant him sums from the gnome of the flintlock, Tom, without delay! Grant him the steel of the"enforcer" ! Grant him transport in Air Force One!
But most of all, dear Bubble, grant us the stultification, fear and tyranny of an admittance to Jesus land and non commie style redness that only your intercession for your loud instrument may provide!
But in all things, Old Lord, Bubble Boy, we prostrate ourselves to your greater Hooverian vision and Millard Fillmore like intellectual acuity! Intercede, we beseech you, on behalf of all conservat-droids all over Mock!
With you, as our intercessor, Social Security is superfluous!"
Count me as one vote, for Cantwell.